Gearing up for Christmas...What? It's Not Even Halloween!

Most of you are going to think I'm somewhat crazy after I tell you this. OK, here it goes.. I've already started my Christmas shopping. Actually, I started in September. I don't really have a list, but if I see something marked down, I grab it and stuff it in my favorite hiding place.

Crazy yet? I know it's not even Halloween. But, let me explain.

You see, I can already feel the stress creeping up and peeking around the corner at me. It's tiptoeing ever so slowly toward me until December, when about a week or so after Thanksgiving, it closes in on me then clothes lines me and knocks me flat on my back, while it robs me of all the joy the Christmas season is supposed to bring.

Each year is worse than before, and I suspect it's because as children grow, so does their awareness of "things". They start to associate Christmas with getting "stuff". And even though I don't want Christmas for my kids to be focused on getting presents, the truth is, it is exciting for them and I love to see their eyes light up as they tear open the bright, sparkly paper I picked especially with them in mind. 

In addition, we as parents have more commitments and more responsibilities each year. We drive to this place for a party and that place to hunt down the perfect gift. We have events at school and at church and the list goes on. 

That said, here's the top three reasons I've started collecting those gifts:

1. I dislike crowds. I would rather pull my fingernails off one by one than to be out on Black Friday. Maybe it's because I worked in retail for a long time or maybe it's because my mom is the same way, but nevertheless, the more likely there are to be crowds, the less likely I will be there.

2. Real sales are not on popular shopping days. It is a myth that you can get lots of great deals on Black Friday and Christmas Eve. Yes, those really marked down TVs they have like two of are great deals, but they are called loss leaders to get you in the store. Then, retailers assume since you will be there already, you will buy other things out of convenience at regular prices. Or, retailers will out right lie and tell you the "sale" is only on this day. The best time to buy is now. September and October are generally slow months for retailers so they have clearance sales to get rid of merchandise to make room for the new fall items and Christmas stock.

3. I'm less stressed, when I'm more prepared. If I wait to pack everything I have to do into December, I become a crazy- acting female version of the Grinch on way too much caffeine. I get those wide bulgy-looking eyes with dark circles from all the riff-raff and lack of sleep and I'm miserable towards my family. Who needs that? When I have my shopping mostly complete, I can then calm down and be more meditative about the fact that we are really celebrating a baby's birth. A baby who would ultimately offer salvation to the world. Jesus. Ahhhh.

Already I've started asking my oldest, Jenna, what she might want for Christmas. The reasons I do this are futile because she really has no answers for me. If she does come up with something, I know when she gets the gift, she most likely will play with it only on Christmas day. Then it will gather dust like all the other toys she's received that she thought would be so great.

So, I asked her the other day, "Jenna, Christmas is just a few months away. What do you think you are going to ask for this year?" She replied, "A, robot." "Really??," I asked, confused. I wondered where she got this robot thing from. 

A few days later, we started the conversation again. "Why a robot?," I asked. "So it can help you go around and do all your chores," she answered. 

Stunned, I just sat there for a minute. I didn't know whether to feel loved by that statement or just plain sad. It was sweet that she wanted me to have help, but it made me think she thought I was way too busy. Too busy for her. Convicted, I pressed, "Do you think a robot would help me spend more time with you and less time on chores." "Yes," she said, sounding relieved I understood.

As I journey through motherhood, I often find myself tugged and pulled in many different directions. There's always laundry to do, dishes to be put away, appointments to make. I struggle with finding that delicate balance between spending quality time with my children and managing a home so that my family feels comfortable and taken care of. I find that when I'm too one- sided on either, I end up neglecting something. 

Often times, God will reveal truth to me by using my children. The same week Jenna said she wanted a robot, is the same week she came home from school with the memory verse, "Children are a gift from the Lord. They are a reward from him" (Psalm 127:3 NLT). It was absolute confirmation for me that the conviction I felt about neglecting to spend time with her was real and not just the Enemy making me feel guilty. God was showing me that the best gift I can give my children is my time because he's blessed me with the gift of their life.

So how do I go from here? I'm not quite sure. Maybe I just need to let go of some things and make time for my family and other relationships. Perhaps prayer (because I have a hard time letting go). Not getting so worked up over holidays is a start. But is that wishful thinking? Has our culture caused us to fret and run around trying to meet the December 25 deadline?

I would love to hear your thoughts. How do you make time for your children? What are some ways you've found peace and joy amid all the frenzy during the holidays? Please leave your comments on my blog page or respond on Lessons in Flying's Facebook page. Who knows, maybe your ideas can help me or someone else that may be struggling with being a busy parent.        





          

September Lessons

My friend and women's bible study leader, Laurie, shared with me how she writes down ten things or so that she learns each month into a journal. She suggested that I might like to do the same, since we both agree that for busy moms like us, a quick list of items is much more feasible than trying to commit to journal writing. It has been neat to be able to go back over what I wrote and I wanted to share it with you.

The idea comes from a blog called "Chatting at the Sky". Emily, the writer, is a North Carolinian like I used to be and I'm linking up with her today. Hope you enjoy my September lessons! 

1. I should not try to have discussions with my husband about things that are bothering me (about him) early in the morning. I have a tendency to let him know right away how I feel. Even though I'm glad I don't stuff my feelings, I do need to work on my timing. Lest I want to start the day off poorly, I had better keep my mouth shut before he's had a cup of coffee.

2. Waiting until the storage on my phone is completely full with pictures and videos before deciding to transfer them to my computer and save them is not a good idea. This literally takes half a day and then gives me a stinky attitude since I'm not very tech savvy. 

3. Think before you type and send. Those of you who know me well, know I'm not a fan of football. A friend of mine posted on Facebook something about being excited for a football game and before I knew it I wrote, "Football sucks," on her timeline. I then had to go back and re-write an apology because I wasn't sure if she would take it lightly or unfriend me.

4. Expect something out of the ordinary to happen when your husband goes out of town. It always does. My husband works nearly 365 days a year in the service department of a car dealership, except the few weeks he travels out of town for business. This month my truck's battery decided to die while he was out of town. Thankfully, it was parked in the garage and not out on the road somewhere!

5. My children are mostly well-behaved. I had the pleasure of volunteering in Jenna's class this month and I'm happy to report that she is one of the better behaved students in the class. It was shocking how disruptive and disrespectful many of the children were. What was wonderful though, was how I got to see the fruits of all the hard work I have done thus far in teaching her right from wrong and disciplining her. I'm proud that I've created firm boundaries, told her "no" even when it was hard, and taught her that she is to listen to and respect adults. I know I don't always get it right and I know she won't either, but it was nice to finally feel good about my choices as a parent, instead of always feeling guilty.

6. Number 5 was a great introduction to my next lesson. I'm glad I didn't become a Kindergarten teacher. I thought in high school that I wanted to be a elementary school teacher and it still sounds fun if I would have nice, gentle, well behaved boys and girls. But, the reality is that leading children is not for the faint of heart. Jenna's teachers have an extreme amount of patience and endurance to deal with all the energy, distractibility, and lack of self discipline five-year-olds possess. I came away from volunteering in Jenna's class with a fond appreciation for what teachers do daily. 

7. I enjoy gardening and working outside, especially with my dad. I'm not quite sure what it is about growing something like plants or flowers that appeals to me. Maybe it's that nurturing instinct within me. But whatever it is, I love it. Somehow, when my parents are here, I always manage to get my dad to help me in the yard. I don't really know how he feels about it, but I like working side by side with him. I feel a closeness and a bond with him when we're working together.

8. Omitting dairy from my diet helps my acne. When I turned thirty, it seemed like I began to break out again like when I was a teenager. I tried tons of products, which mostly failed because they are made and marketed to teens. I read some research online that suggested dairy may be a trigger of acne flare ups. Although not solid evidence, I decided to give it a shot, since nothing else I tried seemed to be working. Now, I'm not completely acne free, but a lot better and the pimples I do get are manageable with a good cleansing routine.